The adventures (and non-adventures) of a marginally seasoned attorney.

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Sunday, January 24, 2010

Half-Marathon Training, or: How I Learned to Stop Whining and Love the... MY LEGS ARE BURNING MAKE IT STOP!!

I was never an athlete.  When I was a kid, the coaches stuck me out in left field during t-ball season because no one could hit the ball that far (except this one portly kid, but he couldn't run very quickly so my inability to throw or catch the ball was irrelevant). And though I was never the last one to get picked for dodgeball teams back in the day, that was because I never actually played dodgeball.

As you may know, though, I've been running road races since my 2L year.  I'm not exactly sure why I decided to do that, but it probably had something to do with the fact that I was addicted to Hershey bars with almonds at the time and was not willing to give up that high-calorie habit.  Anyway, I'm usually one of the last ones to finish each race, but I've had a good time at them.  I've had such a good time that I've decided to run a half marathon in March.

The problem with this half-marathon decision is that I decided to quit running for the entire month of December (thanks, finals!).  And a good portion of January, too (thanks, laziness!).  So now, it's 40-ish days to race day and I'm getting exhausted after running only 4 miles. Since running the whole dang thing is looking less and less likely, I'm trying to come up with ways to not fail miserably:

  1. Run as much of the race as I can, walk the rest of the way, and congratulate myself afterward on a valiant effort
  2. Run as much of the race as I can, find a "shortcut" along the way, and impress the masses with my excellent finish time
  3. Put on a sweatband and walkman and join the power walkers
  4. Not join the power walkers but put on the sweatband and walkman anyway
I'm willing to bet that the final result is going to be a combination of #1 and #4.

Anyway, I'm going to get through all of this without whining, mark my words.  The chorus of my running theme song starts out with the lyrics "He's fat and he don't run too fast. But he's faster than me."   And this pretty much describes every race I've ever run, but I always manage to finish with a a smile on my face.  So you go, man who don't run too fast!  You'll see me at the finish line in a few minutes.

3 comments:

Rachel Cotterill said...

One day I'd like to run a marathon (note that I haven't run anything since doing sprints in high school). I reassure myself that I can walk 26 miles without breaking a sweat ... I might not get a reasonable time, but dammit, I'd definitely finish!

Leah said...

Half marathon, eh? Have fun with that! When is this race, again? I'll think good thoughts for you while I'm sitting on my ass watching TV and eating high-calorie food snacks.

SoloTraveler said...

portly?? Nice lingo ;)